


Turnt Tables

by Malec_Lover23



Category: Turnt Tables
Genre: Actually like one line of angst, Alec Lightwood Loves Magnus Bane, Boys In Love, Cuddling & Snuggling, Domestic Fluff, Domestic Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Drunk Magnus Bane, Good Friend Catarina Loss, Happy Alec Lightwood, Happy Magnus Bane, Idiots in Love, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Magnus Bane & Catarina Loss Friendship, Magnus Bane Deserves Nice Things, Magnus Bane Loves Alec Lightwood, Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood Fluff, No Angst, Sappy Magnus Bane
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-17
Updated: 2020-10-17
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:20:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,113
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27055570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Malec_Lover23/pseuds/Malec_Lover23
Summary: Get the title? Because normally Alec is the one who is drunk and turnt means under the influence of alcohol ;)Yeah that’s literally the summary. Magnus gets wasted asf, Catarina does a bit of reminiscing, and Alec adores his husband.
Relationships: Alec Lightwood & Catarina Loss, Magnus Bane & Catarina Loss, Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood
Kudos: 110
Collections: Fluff vs. Angst Battle 2020





	Turnt Tables

**Author's Note:**

> This is kinda unrelated, but to clear up any confusion, they’re married but still living in NY. I honestly can’t see them living anywhere else especially not so soon after they get married so I’m incapable of writing them living in Alicante. Honestly tell me how you feel about them in Alicante in the comments because I’m curious about what you think! 
> 
> Catarina is a queen 👑 
> 
> Kudos comments and subscriptions make my day so leave them if you’d like :)

"And then...and then Ragnor..." Magnus snorts and shakes his head, taking a sip of his martini before continuing, "Ragnor literally charged after the goat to try and get it back, but we all know that just made it worse. Damn, what I would do to have an iPhone to record that moment." The small group of warlocks around the table chuckle.

"He would've hated a dinner party like this." Magnus comments, reaching over the table for Catarina's half empty glass of champagne. 

"Magnus, I do believe you're wasted in every sense of the word. Perhaps you should take a break." Catarina says, lifting an eyebrow in amusement when Magnus pouts at her suggestion. It only makes him even more enthusiastic as he attempts to reach the drink a second time. 

"Any more stories up your sleeve, Bane?" 

Magnus waves a dismissive hand in the direction of the High Warlock of Portland, who is fairly new in his journey of being High Warlock. "There's plenty more where that came from. I have so many stories about so many people, but I've yet to talk about my husband today. That's a shame." Catarina snorts, attempting to hold in her laughter when the table collectively groans. Even though these are some of Magnus' best friends, even they have heard enough about Alec to last at least a few centuries. 

"What?" Magnus asks defensively. "If any of you have a problem with him, then get the hell out!" He points a ringed finger to the door of the High Warlock of San Diego's place where he so happily agreed to host dinner. He probably regrets it now. 

Catarina eyes her best friend suspiciously, knowing the more he drinks the worse he's going to end up. 

Seeing that it's closer to midnight in Los Angeles, which means it's almost 3 over in New York, Catarina sighs and slips her phone out of her back pocket. 

Magnus has made a close knit group of friends over the past few centuries. After he lost his magic, some of those people he thought were friends never reached out, but this group they've had dinner and drinks with tonight has always been good to Magnus. Then, once everything with Jonathan settled down and Magnus gained his original position back after the wedding, they all realized they haven't gotten together in months. 

It really has been a fun night, even Catarina has to admit, and she hates everything about a dinner party. Magnus has always been the social one. 

She pulls up Alec's cell number and stands up, gaining the attention of a giggly Magnus in the middle of a story about Alec getting scared of a spider after killing ten Shax demons in a alleyway just moments before. 

"Where are ya going Cat? Don't leave me! You're the only one who actually loves Alexander here."

Catarina scoffs and rolls her eyes, "I do not love your husband. I tolerate him because he makes you happy. Keep telling your story, I'm just checking up on Madzie." 

If Magnus weren't so drunk, he would have caught her lie immediately, but he just grins and accepts the drink that was passed around the table to him. 

Catarina glares at the amused warlocks practically giddy with delight at seeing Magnus so careless and unguarded. 

She clicks on Alec's contact and steps out into another room. "Catarina? S' wrong?" She hears rustling over the phone. She may feel bad about waking him up, but she'd feel even worse if she didn't get Magnus home safely. 

"Nothing's wrong, Alec. I'm just giving you a heads up that I'm about to portal the insanely wasted High Warlock of Brooklyn home." 

Alec sighs, "How bad is it, really?" 

Catarina winces when he hears Magnus screaming about deepthroating and then the roaring laughter of everyone else sitting at the table. 

"Uhm, let's just say he's currently yelling about deepthroating." 

"Christ, get him home." Alec says, "I'll get out of bed and wait for you to portal in."

"Alright. It may be a few minutes, I have no idea how argumentative he’ll be.” 

“Okay, please be safe.” Catarina agrees and hangs up. She walks back out into the dining room. 

"Hey Magnus, it's time to go back to Brooklyn." 

Magnus shakes his head, lifting his drink up in and then downing it. "No, it's not. I haven't even had enough alcohol." 

"You actually have had way too much to drink, but you wouldn't know that because you're too far gone already. Come on, time to go home."

"No, I'm not done telling my story about Alexander seeing Tokyo for the first time." A lightbulb goes off in Catarina’s head, she normally doesn’t like to play dirty but this is a sure-fire way to get Magnus to follow her through a portal. 

"Alec just texted and said he wants you to come home. He's waiting on you." Catarina smirks, she's certainly piqued Magnus' interest now. Magnus sets his drink down and looks at Catarina. “He said he has to get up early in the morning but he can't sleep without you.” 

Magnus smiles and murmurs something along the lines of “adorable but clingy Shadowhunters.”

"Oh, well then," Magnus stands up, gripping the table. "I need to go home, surely you all understand how clingy my husband can get. You know about him, his name is Alec and he's just the dreamiest guy you'll ever meet!” Magnus twists the ring around his left ring finger and squints his eyes, staring down at it. 

"Okay, Magnus, everyone knows about your husband. Come along now, he's waiting for you." Catarina grabs his arm and tugs him to an open space, where she summons a portal. 

"Catarina, I can barely walk." Magnus says with a frown, turning to her. 

"I know, just hold onto me. We're going to your loft. Think about that and Alec." 

Magnus nods solemnly, gripping onto Catarina's arm. They go through the portal and she breathes a sigh of relief when they end up directly in front of a sleepy but nervous Alec. 

The corner of his mouth lifts into a crooked smile as Magnus gasps. "Cat! Cat, that's my husband I was telling you about! Alexander, hi!" Alec opens his arms and Magnus nearly jumps into them, nuzzling against his chest with a contented sigh. 

"Hi, Magnus, did you have a good night with your friends?" Alec leans down and presses a kiss to his spiked up hair. 

"The best night ever." Magnus mumbles, sagging against Alec. 

"That's good, Mags." Alec runs a soothing hand down his back. Catarina and Alec glance at each other. 

It just occurs to Catarina that she no longer has to take care of her oldest friend. If this happened fifty years ago, Catarina would have had to carry Magnus to bed, make him drink water until he cursed her out, and then deliver a hangover potion at dawn to make sure he gets better before he starts seeing clients. That was pretty much routine for them, and she never minded doing it, as Magnus has always been more than just a best friend to her. 

She's seen him at his lowest, and for that century before Alec came along, that time was Magnus' lowest. 

She definitely doesn't want to leave tonight without making sure Alec understands just how much she appreciates making Magnus the happiest man in the world, the man who makes Catarina a better friend, a better mother, a better nurse. 

"Thank you for being here and taking care of him." She says softly, and even though it isn't everything she wants to say to him, he understands. 

"Of course." He replies, tightening his grip on Magnus' waist. Magnus presses his face into his neck, humming happily while waving to Cat. 

"Bye, Cat! I have this really pretty man to take care of me now." He lowers his voice and stumbles closer to her, "And did you know... he's my husband?" 

Catarina laughs and pulls him into a side hug. "I did know that. You got very lucky, Magnus, even I have to admit that." She kisses Magnus on the cheek and winks at Alec. 

She flicks her wrist and suddenly Magnus’ face is bare, his hair is free of gel, and his vest and dress pants are gone, replaced with a pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt. 

Magnus looks up in awe, saying, “I know I’ve done that before but I didn’t think I could do it without thinking about the spell!” 

Catarina snorts, “You’re so very magical, Magnus.”She says sarcastically before creating a portal and stepping into it, headed for her own bed. 

As Catarina pays Madzie’s babysitter, kisses Madzie on the forehead, and falls into bed herself, she thinks she’ll tolerate Magnus’ sappy stories and proclamations of love if it means her best friend gets to smile like that again, and laugh like his heart hasn't been battered and bruised. 

Back at the loft, Magnus turns around slowly and smirks when he sees Alec. “Come back over here, Alexander!" Magnus whines, motioning to the three foot distance between them. 

"Maybe some water might be nice?" Magnus gasps like Alec just slapped him and presses his hand against his chest. 

He goes crossed eyed as he attempts to focus on Alec, and Alec chuckles in amusement. 

"Here." Alec turns and grabs the glass of water he had sitting on the coffee table after Catarina called. "Drink this, and then we'll go to bed." 

"Woahhh you're gonna take me to bed? I've never been more excited to go to beddddd!" 

"There's nothing excited about it, babe. We're just going to sleep. And then I'm going to watch you puke your guts out in the morning."

This doesn't seem to faze Magnus; he turns to face Alec and blinks at him owlishly. Alec hands him the glass of water. Magnus reluctantly takes it and dramatically sighs before drinking it in three sips. 

Alec can't help but think that's the way Magnus was downing alcohol back at dinner. 

"Tell me about dinner. Did everyone enjoy that story about Ragnor and the goat?" 

Magnus smiles, "Yeah, they liked that one a lot. I was starting to tell them about you, but then Catarina so rudely interrupted me and said we had to go home." Magnus lifts his hands up and shrugs, nearly hitting Alec in the face. 

"But honestly, you're so pretty, so it's okay! And you're the one that's gonna take me to bed? Angels, I've won the lottery!" Alec snorts and tugs on Magnus' arm, gently placing the glass back on the table and wrapping an arm around his waist. 

Magnus slides his hand up the back of Alec's hoody, sending shivers down Alec's spine. "Can we do things other than sleeping?" He asks cheekily, grabbing the end of the hoody and lifting it up. 

"Dear God, no, not when you're like this." Alec murmurs, lacing their hands together and giving Magnus a push toward the bedroom.

“That’s literally no fun at all. Alexxxaaaanderrrr!! Are you telling me the most gorgeous Angel in the entire world is taking me to bed and we just get to sleep? Unfair!!” Magnus grumbles under his breath as Alec drags Magnus to the bed. 

Alec shushes him and gently wrestles him to bed, placating him by giving him a few open mouthed kisses. Magnus hums and pulls on the stings of Alec’s hoody. 

“That’s all?” Magnus huffs when Alec steps away to his side of the bed. He flicks the lights off and then slides into bed, immediately being met with a warlock latching onto him wherever he possibly can. 

“Magnus, we have to sleep now.” Alec reminds him, trying to stay serious for the sake of getting Magnus to listen to him. “If you can sleep now, then I’ll let you have your way with me in the morning if you’d like.”

“Promise?” Magnus speaks in a hushed tone, lifting his pinkie finger in the air. 

Alec fondly smiles, linking their fingers together and saying with a note of finality, “I promise.”

“Don’t break it! I gave you my pinkie, which is the most sacred vow anyone can make.” Alec raises an eyebrow, because, hey, what about their marriage vow? 

However, he chooses to delay the teasing for the morning when Magnus can actually be aware enough to groan and flip Alec off, even while pulling him closer and kissing his collarbone. 

Magnus doesn’t complain too much, because he convinces Alec to call in sick and take care of him instead of going to work and leaving him all alone in bed with a hangover.


End file.
